Finding real people
RU is an internet thing. The internet can be amazingly useful. Despite its famous social networking it is not really a very personal way to find or have relationships. For a start you are likely to be sitting there on your own reading words. If you move a muscle at all it will usually be to type words that can only go distantly to another person.
So, if at all possible, RU wants to encourage you to turn away from this impersonal virtual internet help and think harder about who you might be able to ask - friends, family, or helping services. Even if you tend to think of your family and friends negatively, try to think again. Think of them as being like you, human beings, vulnerable, troubled, maybe survivors of hardship, courageous, experienced - even if the result is they're a bit toughened up and off-putting.
Or maybe you have lively memories of important people in your lives, people who are now absent or dead, but who might give comfort or inspiration. Even "an imaginary discussion" with them might be better than we can be here for you. Maybe a powerfully real published story or fictional character in a book or famous or on TV could help or inspire you to find comfort, support to flourish or find solutions
So the first thing to try is to see if you can find some real people before reading more here.
Relationships are important. Look at this youtube of the famous still face experiment with babies. But think of how all the same things happen in adult relationships too if people blank each other.
All it takes to make or break a relationship is for one person to be responsive or to go blank on the other one. Pay this kind of simple attention to the people around you - it won't be long before they notice you too. That's the start of a relationship for you.
So, if at all possible, RU wants to encourage you to turn away from this impersonal virtual internet help and think harder about who you might be able to ask - friends, family, or helping services. Even if you tend to think of your family and friends negatively, try to think again. Think of them as being like you, human beings, vulnerable, troubled, maybe survivors of hardship, courageous, experienced - even if the result is they're a bit toughened up and off-putting.
Or maybe you have lively memories of important people in your lives, people who are now absent or dead, but who might give comfort or inspiration. Even "an imaginary discussion" with them might be better than we can be here for you. Maybe a powerfully real published story or fictional character in a book or famous or on TV could help or inspire you to find comfort, support to flourish or find solutions
So the first thing to try is to see if you can find some real people before reading more here.
Relationships are important. Look at this youtube of the famous still face experiment with babies. But think of how all the same things happen in adult relationships too if people blank each other.
All it takes to make or break a relationship is for one person to be responsive or to go blank on the other one. Pay this kind of simple attention to the people around you - it won't be long before they notice you too. That's the start of a relationship for you.
